The Union of Sisterhood: How the Designing of a Reception Dress Brought This Designer-Aunt and Bride-Niece Duo Together to Support Each Other in a Time of Loss and Love

Arguably the most important day in a woman’s life is her wedding day, and that ante is upped when it comes to that of a Black Woman’s experience with her nuptial celebration. The idea of marriage is a daunting one for Black Women in particular, thanks in part to outside factors such as societal pressures, lifestyle goals and constant national breaches of Black Love security. So, when the day arrives, it holds a magnanimous weight in our lives. With these components, coupled with the compulsion to show up and show out for the big day, many Black Brides find themselves searching for support to undergird them and build them up at a time they find themselves feeling their most vulnerable.

For Black Women across the diaspora, sisterhood is where we find our strength. Aside from faith and the overall familial structure, it’s something very specific and divine that occurs when Black Women meet the construct of Sisterhood. Whether biological or by choice, through cross-generational connection of aunt and niece or sister to sister, finding, keeping, and maintaining sisterhood has aided in Black Women’s survival. Due to its innate healing properties and natural communal foundation, sisterhood is a medicine, if you will; an agent of self-care by which Black Women use to survive and thrive in a world that often tears them apart.

For Aniyah Gordon, the idea of having support on and in anticipation of her wedding day was drastically shifted after the sudden passing of her mother in 2020.

So, it was only natural that after her engagement to her longtime boyfriend, Donald Gordon, that her aunts, affectionately known as “The Golden Girls”, showed up for her as true sisters do. And in that aunty-girl group includes her designer-aunt Kimberly Goldson, former Project Runway Season 9 finalist and founder of the eponymous New York ready-to-wear brand that has helped expand the way for fellow, modern, Black-Woman led design houses.

Kimberly Goldson: Aniyah and I are aunty and niece through love. Her mom, myself and my two other best friends grew up together, so since Aniyah was born, she’s been in my life; just a little ray of sunshine with all her sass and her love for people. Unfortunately, when her mom passed during the pandemic, it was upon us as her family to step up in her life. [During that], our relationship grew and blossomed more. We made sure that she was covered as it pertains to never feeling alone and never being in this world by herself since her mom wasn’t here; we just tried to fill in the blank spots.

Image by Aniyah Gordon.

Aniyah Gordon: I knew that these people were always here but it’s hard for me to accept help or understand I’m not a sympathy case for people. So, between Kimberly and my mom’s two other best friends, after my mom passed away, I think the relationship was a little more highlighted. And I appreciated the authenticity of it. It never felt like “I feel bad for you”, or “Call me if you need me”, it was moreso a feeling of “we’re in this together now”; it just became a way of life.

Image by Aniyah Gordon.

Aniyah enlisted her aunts, best friend and sister to travel with her to New York to go wedding dress shopping. This pairing of synergy was a decisive move on Aniyah’s part. She shares about her decision to invite the ladies, “I think I am sometimes a people pleaser. When it comes to making decisions, I sometimes think about what other people will think but these women know me almost better than I know myself so just having them there to help guide me also helped me in knowing who to have in the room.”

After finding her dream ceremony dress at Pantora Bridal, a Black-Owned bridal shop, Aniyah knew she wanted to keep up with the Black Business-Forward approach.

“It was very important to me that every dollar that I spent went back to black people so every vendor at my wedding from napkins to chairs was a Black entrepreneur.” Aniyah shares.

Image by The Fifth Media & JR the Kid Productions.

So, it made sense that the next natural step would be for her aunt to design her show stopper reception dress.

KG: “When I was asked to do the second dress, it was a matter of “how are we going to differentiate this dress from the first dress so that they can both have their own moment?” And that was the challenge as a designer.

When it came down to dress design, Kimberly’s eponymous RTW fashion brand’s “Brooklyn Born – Sister Crafted – Luxury Driven” manifesto served as the guidelines for the feeling and overall aesthetic of the over the top gown.

Image by Kimberly Goldson.

KG: [For this dress], it had to be flavor and luxury at the same time. In my aesthetic, I like to do things a bit differently. I like pieces that have a standout factor to them so this dress couldn’t be any different. And when she gave me her vision, I wanted to take even that up a notch. As Black Women, when we show up, we like to show out and that’s the DNA of the Kimberly Goldson brand and what Aniyah wanted. When you consult with a designer, it has to be a marriage of the client’s vision and your expertise as a designer. Aniyah trusted me even when she couldn’t see the vision so working together, I knew what the steps were to get there and where to ask for and get more.

As for when the final fitting occurred, Kimberly’s pride and Aniyah’s trust in her faith were the most palpable emotions felt in the room on both ends.

KG: For me, I was absolutely proud because we had been working on it for a full year and talking about it for two years. As a designer, you’re always going to be critical but I was proud and what gave me joy was to know that she loved it.

Image by The Fifth Media & JR the Kid Productions.

And while every bride dreams of sharing her most special day with the woman in her life that means the most, her mother, Aniyah was able to find the divinity of it all through the power of fashion.

Image by The Fifth Media & JR the Kid Productions.

AG: I was a little emotional internally because my mom passed away and as a little girl, you dream of sharing those moments with your mother but I was thankful that even in her absence, with my aunts there, i didn’t feel like I was inadequate of anything and that who was needed emotionally was there for me. Seeing the full look come together, it felt like “we’re here”.

Aniyah continues, “For me, it really was a reminder of God’s got it. You oftentimes are in situations where they say “oh, God’s got it” or “He’s not gonna let you fail”, but when you’re in the moment, you truly can’t see it. So, being someone who’s not really into fashion, when I tried on my muslin, I called my best friend and was like “I don’t know what I just tried on and I don’t see it”, and I tried it on the next day with more progress having been made to it and I was like, “Oh! How did we go from this to that? Maybe this thing can work!” It was just such a reminder of my faith for me and to hold on and that everything would be alright in the end. It was like my mustard seed moment.”

Image by The Fifth Media & JR the Kid Productions.

So, for brides looking to craft moments of sisterhood and fashion into their big day, this aunt and niece duo have the best advice.

Aniyah shares, “Don’t get lost in it thinking of everyone else. This is your moment. Live in the moment and stand on business so you don’t have any wedding regrets. Don’t feel bad about doing what you love. Stay true to who you are.” And Kimberly Goldson adds, “You don’t want to look back uncomfortable with your day. Don’t get something that has you uncomfortable. If you’re a bohemian chic style in your real life, find a dress that matches that! Stay true to yourself and elevate it for your day so you can look back and say and see that you were 100% yourself.

And if both the lyrics to the theme song of 2000s cult classic show Girlfriends serves as a definition of what true sisterhood is and the Biblical Proverb is true in professing that “in the multitude of counsel there is safety”, than surely you can find solace in your own sisterhoods for your big day and craft the dress and day of your dreams–through loss and love.